Personal Glimpses into our Life and Ministry in Tanzania

By: Beth Calmes

“My life changed for good twelve years ago in the DFW airport. Confused and scared I walked with my parents and sister through a long corridor. We boarded the plane and I put my family, friends, and home behind me, the unknowns of Africa before me. I did not understand why we were leaving for Africa. Nonetheless we got on a British Airways flight and began our long journey. Many hours [later] we arrived. My heart pounded hard against my chest; I did not understand what people were saying. After what seemed like an eternity, we emerged from behind the safety of the airport walls. Strangers came up to us and hugged us saying how glad they were to see us. The strange men and women took us to their cars and hustled us off to a town called Morogoro. In Morogoro my parents went to a language school where they learned how to speak Swahili. During the day, while my parents were at school being taught, they sent my sister and me to a local elementary school. The two of us were the only English speakers there. I was scared out of my mind. The teachers made us sit on the concrete floor every day because they had no desks or chairs for us to sit on. During our break times the students stared at us as if we were aliens. I did not know what to make of all this strange attention, and neither did my sister. But we were forced to move on and cope with it.”

Twenty-two years later these words still bring tears to my eyes. Our daughter Caity was four when we arrived, and it was in 2009 that she wrote this for a 12th grade assignment. Mitch rediscovered her story recently and had me reread it. I was reminded again that rookie missionary kids struggle on a vastly different level than their rookie missionary parents.

A month ago, we welcomed a new missionary family to join our ministry for the next two years. We are currently busy helping them adjust. One of their daughters is four. I think of Caity and what she silently endured in 1996 and I desire to help this new little one and her siblings adjust well.

Caity struggled some with her new environment. We were so absorbed in our own struggle for adjustment that we were often unaware of her and her sister Stephi’s private fears. Missionary kids get little special training prior to leaving for the field, no seminars on dealing with culture shock, no personality profile tests, no special counseling to prepare them for the days ahead, no language ability test. I think it’s fair to say that their initial experiences are potentially more difficult and shocking than their parents. Their challenges are starkly real, yet often largely overlooked.

I am thankful for God’s amazing grace to my daughters. They grew to thrive in their new country and to embrace their new home. Our daughter, Abbey was born here and her experience was easier. However, when each one left Tanzania, they were not leaving a foreign country, they were leaving their home and it was hard. Thankfully, Caity’s story in Tanzania ends in a much better way than it began…

“Over the course of several months I began to learn and understand Swahili, … I knew the basic greetings and a few other useful words. I started to make friends with a few of the nationals at my school and to understand their culture. My memories of America began to slowly fade away. Africa was becoming what I knew. I was scared and confused at the beginning, but as time wore on Africa became my home, and America my home away from home, not only then but to this very day. One day when I leave I will go with only half my heart, for I belong in the exotic cities and hills of the continent I love, Africa, and part of me will remain even when I am physically gone.

We missionary parents don’t always understand what our MK’s are experiencing deep inside, but I know one thing— Tanzania became our beloved home. My girls climbed Kilimanjaro, rafted down the Nile river, biked across Northern Kenya, visited game parks, vacationed in Zanzibar, adopted and were adopted by a different culture and people. But, best of all, they got to see God work in amazing ways. They saw his protection, his grace, his love and his providence for our little family that many times didn’t do everything right, but that always did it together.